Jeudi 9 décembre 2010 à 0:43

Je déteste les guitaristes, et j'aime les bassistes.
Aux musiciens que j'ai tant aimés et qui m'ont tant brulée, je préfère le photographe.
A tous ceux qui sont restés, je préfère celui qui part.
Aux filles lisses et propres, je préfère Angie, ses piercings, ses tatouages, son cimetière.

Bizarre.

T'es une fille bizarre, toi, t'es étrange, t'es pas comme les autres, tu cultives ta différence, t'es arrogante, antipathique, t'es hautaine, distante, tu fais jamais rien comme les autres, pourquoi tu passes de Metallica aux Fugees, mais quand est-ce que tu mens ? Il serait tant que tu grandisses, mais t'es vieille et jeune à la fois, et tes piercings et tes tatouages, et surtout surtout

tu fais peur.


Avant j'aimais les yeux des garçons, mais toi, toi ce sont tes mains, tes mains je les aime tant, pourquoi ?
Au creux de moi désormais un territoire sombre et interdit, à déchiffrer du bout des doigts, une musique qui n'existe que pour nous et nous dansons à l'instinct.
L'amour, ce n'est pas un jeu, non, c'est une danse, qu'il soit spirituel ou physique, l'amour est toujours une danse, timide sensuelle violente sexuelle.
Je redeviens primitive, j'ai envie de mordre, de te mordre et de te griffer, je voudrais croquer dans ta chair, te dévorer, c'en est obsédant. Et quand je te mords fort tu ne dis rien, tu n'enlèves même pas ton bras, tu attends, et les marques rouges de mes dents, rouges voire violettes dans ta peau claire.
J'ai trop de choses dans la tête, trop d'histoires, j'absorbe tout ce qui passe à ma portée, partout des textes d'enfants paumés. Et je n'écris que des filles qui ne sont pas encore des femmes et des garçons troubles ; il y a déjà Chloé, Emma, Suzie, Eve, Raphaëlle et demain il y aura peut-être Victoire ou Eléonore. Et toi, toi aussi je voudrais te donner un prénom de fille tellement je m'approprie mieux ce qui est féminin.
Ou alors un nom de chien.

Malsaine, t'es glauque, ragazza, et pourtant l'innocence dans les yeux, coucher avec toi en devient sale, mais t'es tellement belle j'y peux rien, t'es fatale.

Pourtant je suis heureuse.
Angie dit que je suis la fille qui agace par excellence, et que c'est pour ça que dans un groupe je suis toujours détestée, parce que je n'ai pas peur de parler ou d'être indifférente, parce que je lance mes blagues sales, parce que je suis toujours féminine, Angie dit que j'incarne ce que les autres ne sont pas.

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